YOUR GREAT LOVE
what a blessed gift
your being with me
in the early morning hours,
requesting what my ego
would resist,
were You not
most important.
when you asked
i replied "Yes, Baba"
without hesitation
apologies
or explanations,
because
You are most High.
You beamed, turning rosey
with delight at
my caring more to obey
than self-protect.
How could i do otherwise
when You, Omniscient Lord,
are the One who knows,
cares and helps
in all-ways,
always.
Then you grasped my hand
squeezing it with warmth
and Love Divine,
eloquently saying
"I am very pleased with you.
Everything will turn out fine."
Only because You,
Beloved Baba,
have graced my life
with your Great Love.
*******
FIRE AND LIGHT
Your fire burns away my self,
Your radiance illumines my being with Love,
I'm consumed and filled
by your transforming Light.
What mystery! O, Resplendent One!
*******
HOW CAN I...?
How can i tell you
what the mind does not know?
How can i whisper the fragrance
of the Divine?
How can i point out the One
when nothing else exists?
The silence is thundering.
*******
LOVE REMEMBERS
fuzzy soup
i swim in
where nothing exists
except now
and
now and
now,
and now
stretching into undivided infinity.
soft and cuddly
like a favorite
comforting teddy bear
slowed mind
isn't hearing
ego's crackling
insistence
on fear
and separation.
where there was sadness
joy now abounds,
and where there was darkness
glowing light pervades
happiness
bubbling up
just because
the space between the molecules
has expanded
and light and bouancy
replace leaden depression
when dark nights' remnants
raise their head
and form a garland
on grief's tombstone,
love remembers
*******
WONDER
"What is it you want?", i ask.
"nothing", you say.
"how do i give you that?", i enquire.
"don't try", you reply.
i look at you, puzzled.
you smile effulgently.
i wonder...
why is this so hard?
*******
YOUR LEAVING
How many times have you left me
With abandonment as my companion,
Fulfilling your own ends?
This time your leaving
Is from Love,
And resistent though i may be,
Such bitter medicine
Is divinely ordained.
Someday my heart
will say thanks.
*******
TWO-EDGED SWORD
ah, Baba
what a two edged sword
your gift of your Presence,
finding you and
feeling you
in Everything:
each sparkling leaf
each word spoken
each step taken
every smile
every thought
every squirrel chatting
every osprey flying
every cup of tea supped —
every is-ness
a reflection
of your divinity;
any and every moment
you were there,
permeating
every thing
and not thing
and it filled
my every pore
transporting me
to a State
of finite duration
as after weeks
it began fading
slowly taking leave
as sadly i watched
a ghost image
merging into vastness
my solid self weeping
for a loss
of nothing
that was Everything
and now i am here
no doubt changed
forever,
but missing
that immersion in
Everything is You
and
Only You Exist
ah this mind,
these sanskaras
loosened and unwound,
are still running
in dream circles
i call me.
*******
BAL NATU
i sing your praises
elder brother
as one who has
loved so well,
shined so brightly
through trials and doubts
reaching the prize
of a lover's journey:
total surrender
at His feet.
your tenderness
smile and sweetness
your wisdom
sensitivity and humility
have nourished our
grateful hearts
may blessed union
be yours
in the One
*******
I HAVE SEEN THAT YOU ARE LOVE
i have seen
that you are Love
without ego
without form
without limit
you are It and That.
All that ever was,
and will be,
come to us
on our level of
gross consciousness
and human flesh
so that we can know you
just a little, ever yearning
to be more and more
in your gaze and arms
to remember You
is to contact our very soul's
source, and
meet it face to face
in acknowledgement
of Oneness.
your are indeed the embodiment
of love, mercy and compassion,
infinitely showering us
with your sweet care
on our journey home
*******
EMPTY
hanging in there
one breath at a time,
swimming
in a vacant
pastel zone
where no
ecstatic highs
or leaden lows
exist
sometimes empty
feels like loss
and sometimes
like gain
*******
MY HEART SINGS, FRIEND
you smiled...
our eyes locked
and held their position
into eternity,
connecting us forever
is a palpable lovestream
of golden light.
yesterday you left
that old body.
my heart sings
for your release
and your joy
at being One
with the Beloved.
*******
SILENCE DAY DITTY
"I have told you 'everything is fine'
DO NOT WORRY, you are mine."
Sing and play, enjoy your day,
moving along in Love's own way.
"Never waver in the heart,
Let mind be here and there.
"You and I are never apart,
'Tis Love divine we share."
*******
Life's sometimes sweet
it's sometimes tart,
The Lord knows best —
We play our part!
*******
THAT PRESENCE WITHIN
i can break off from anyone,
except that presence within:
never divided is the unity
that has always been.
i can break off from anyone,
except that presence within:
it never leaves me,
no matter how often
i run away.
i can break off from anyone,
except that presence within:
rejection and abandonment
flow in and out
like endless tides,
surface changes on eternity.
i can break off from anyone,
except that presence within:
how can i peel away
my own self?
"i can break off from anyone,
except that presence within" — a line from Rumi
*******
AGAIN
the robot life
grey and moldy
losing self
in dark, imploding
emotions spiralling down
left
of my center.
who is running the show,
anyway?
looking left and right,
trying not to trip
over
my own toes.
keeping my head up
so i can see
some light,
maybe
the sky
when it is blue.
listening to inner
cranial pounding
like a tape
slicking wild
around its track,
not making sense
or even caring.
the days fall into one another,
stumbling, crashing.
and who knows how,
a sudden awakening
and forward
movement
again.
the window opens
to a lifegiving breeze
coursing thru every
cellular
nook and cranny,
crying
"Yes."
*******
LOVE GROWS
everyday
i get a little happier
as my love for you
grows
like an opening rose
whose perfume
uplifts the soul.
where has all the darkness gone?
consumed in your light.
where has all the tightness gone?
transformed by your love
into a hollow reed
singing the song You play
through every illumined cell
humming Baba.
there are no words
for life of the spirit,
only heart waves
of gratitude and love
filling the wide space
of self's departure
yet i long for the final
annihilation
at the foot
of Your glance...
there is no calling
except your love
whispering
leave all
and become One
*******
DIVINE BLESSING
in this moment
Baba's love is pouring down on me,
through me, and around me.
i swim in His ocean
of untroubled bliss
lost to myself.
i see only Him
in every dancing particle
i know not how
this came to be —
ignorance falling away
and His sweet love
enveloping me
in all that is
and ever could be.
He has brought this smile
to my being,
this boundless joy in my heart.
what mystery that one so unworthy
should be visited by the King!
the shadowy taste
of this glory
will linger
in my being
transformed,
marking the way
to the final true dying
in Him.
*******
I LOVE YOU
i love you
and that is all.
thanking you,
my blessings flower
into gratitude
help me to be the instrument
of your work.
i give you my life
offering it
without restraint.
grant me the courage
to go beyond my fear
in coming ever closer
to You.
what is this life
if not
being with you?
if you are not present
and permeating every
thought, action, and feeling,
existence is hollow,
a dark
mean prison.
i want to be free
wild and open,
flowing as
Your divine energy.
carry me up
into your arms,
embrace me.
let your love
dissolve me,
dear One. please,
emerge as my real self
in each moment,
everybreath.
*******
ALLAH, ALLAH
Allah, Allah
there is but One
among many
always there
always indivisible
always invisible
except for eyes
Divine
*******
I WANT
i want
i want
so many things.
states.
experiences
all keeping me
shackled to density
and duality
i want to be loved
i want to be love
i want to be free
i want to be independent
i want to be your slave
i want to be surrendered
i want to care
i want to be rock-like
i want to dance
i want to be still
i want to create
i want emptiness
how about i want nothing
i want not to want
*******
DANCING, MY BELOVED
dancing, my beloved
in your arms
i waltz
weightlessly
on currents
of love and light
hearing the inner music
of heart's melody
drawing me every closer
as i merge in you
'til at last
we don't exist —
neither you
nor i —
only breath
Is
*******
RESURRECTION POEM
you say you don't like
the dance
as if you were never
consulted —
but that's not true
and self pity rage
suck life.
rise up
from the heap of ashes
to join the light beams.
life is always good.
*******
WITHOUT YOUR LOVE
i am in such pain without You,
and nothing can happen
without Your grace.
the words, the repetitions,
are aridly mechanical,
the breeze of love
blowing through stone corridors
only comes
with Your glance.
bring me close
please, Baba.
hold me to your heart
so i melt
in soft oneness.
lift me up
beyond this self
absorption
so that i may truly see
and be one
with You.
so much pain and grief
held in this little heart
crying out to You!
have pity, Baba.
nothing can be
without
Your love.
*******
PERFECTION
we come to His followers
starry-eyed with love
of the One
knowing He is in all
and who could contain
Him more
than His lovers
only to find
people with hearts
of every size, shape
and content
not so different
from groups
every where
except His hand
softening up
sanskaras
like doughbread
shooting out
fiery sparks
of change and
transmutation
looking like the devil
sometimes
oh it's a brutal
fall
from expectation's
lofty pedestal
to the here and now
reality
that He cannot be
confused
with his Lovers
they are never
His equivalent,
no matter
heart's loving
devotion
they are limited
containers
and He's
the infinite ocean,
they are tainted
and He is pure,
they are progressing
He is the Goal itself —
perfect Perfection!
we have to be
dis-illusioned
from looking anywhere
outside
thinking we can make
an easy substitute
for the fire
of burning all dross
from the heart.
it is there He resides!
He shines everywhere
but lives in that
abode
how long
before you realize
which way to face?
with the Sun before you
the shadows disappear.
*******
MORNING POEM TO BABA
Aug 23, 2004
your soft silky tresses
carressed my face!
so close
to your breath
i felt Love's hum
singing Light
into every cell
forming a cocoon
of no admittance
to life's pain
you carressed
my cheek
in most tender
sweetness
melting
lifetimes'
grief and sorrow
softening
suffering's
hard angles
into
gentle flow
oh miraculous
wonder
you smiled
and the universe glowed
millions of light stars
pouring out of your eyes
in endless mystery
of love's
creation
i bowed deeply
placing heart and head
in profoundest
gratitude
at your perfect
slender feet
gentle tears
washing o'er them
in wondrous joy
my love so full
no more
words to say
the fullness
of Silence
has become
the Way
*******
YES, BABA
you are making me
helpless
and hopeless,
except for
coming near to you.
everything else
you take away,
which i
don't mind,
if it brings me
closer.
i am a mess
with everything
upside down
so out of sorts,
knowing
no direction
except
what leads
to your feet.
i wish
i were different,
but feel
this is how
you want me.
so amidst
the sobs
i say
"yes, Baba."
*******
LEGACY OF LOVE
He dropped his body
and seems no more.
What legacy does this leave?
that which eternally
resides in the heart.
there you will find Him
gloriously alive
in this moment!
no need to become a mullah
worshipping words
creating caste systems
of dictatorial
correctness
when even His words
implemented
with loveless
self-satisfaction
create more bindings.
the mind is not the answer
not the way to know Truth
it is Love
which awakens
and guides
*******
THIS IS NOT THE TIME
this is not the time for words
(it once was)
heavy, limited
and full of angles
give me Wine!
that flowing sparkle
aromatic sweet essence
of who i am
*******
INTO YOUR EMBRACE
i cannot see beyond
the cobalt sky's
puffy clouds
unless i gaze inward
in the vast space
i search for you
thinking there is name and face
but in this perfection
only silence
winks
slowly slowly the need for
having and knowing
falls to the wayside
like outworn ragged coverings
that served their use
once
now a bold step
or should i say surrender
into your nameless soundless
embrace
peace is
*******
WHAT IS REAL
what is there to say?
when words
are as substantial
as vaporizing steam
can i send you a kiss by courier
or buy jewels with counterfeit coin?
only Love is real
*******
IF I COULD LOVE YOU
if i could love You
as i want
and as you deserve
there'd be no me
(doing anything)
so this is dream
and a game
and i play my part
full heartedly
without attachment,
You say
but i am not in control!
i can't obey
as much as i'd like
and you state
IT IS ALL ME,
anyway
so why do i feel guilty
when i'm just a dream
and You're the one
writing the script
and acting all the parts?
it befuddles the mind
|
(which You like)
and leaves only
Love
to answer all
the questions
*******
WHO IS THE ONE
who is the one
who thinks she is
in control?
who has any say
about anything
at all...
a little gnat
making big noise
saying i'm here
pay attention.
what humor
the Creator has,
what a joke
sublime!
we flap and stomp
cry and whine
and dance and sing
and it is all
a dream.
as Kabir says,
"You've been asleep
for millions of years.
why not wake up
this morning?"
*******
IN YOUR SWEET EMBRACE
happily i rest in your sweet arms
an embrace so comforting
i melt into utter tenderness,
a sweet silence
colored pink
by your all knowing, all caring
presto vanishes
the whiney (not winey!) self
and fear's unconnectedness,
mind's tyrannical agenda
of worldly worries
loosened and set free
what liberation the quiet mind
the open heart
the peace of surrender
i ask your help
your sweet caring
to extend this moment
to another and another
grace-ful presence
in your Love
in this place
i am home
*******
THE IMPOSSIBLE BECOMES EASY
thru your Grace
the impossible becomes easy.
poise and flowering were out of reach
until I gave it all to You,
surrendering in trust,
everything became possible.
a miracle.
yet how could it be otherwise?
Oh, Beloved God-Man,
such mysteries of Love!
*******
LOVE DIVINE
"What would you like to say or do...?"
anything, Beloved, that would please you.
"fame and fortune, treasures galore
most people want more ... and more.
remain in my arms
remain at my feet,
consider this Love
God's special treat
you have come far
to enjoy this splendor,
let not thought deter you
from this abode to enter.
the prize is this love
untarnished by self,
kings would give all
for a taste of this wealth.
smile and be happy
always of good cheer.
the rose blooms forever
in the heart that is clear.
Love! Love! Love!
let the light shine.
send my message to all
in this Love Divine."
*******
SO MUCH LOVE ALL AROUND!
"so much love all around!
every person, animal, flower, tree
smiles and nods
at the fragrance of love
that fills the atmosphere
and wondrously transports me
to that timeless land
of utter sweetness."
*******
SILENCE DAY BEGINS...
silence day begins...
silence the mind
the thoughts, desires, and self-will
and lay them at His feet
beside the fragrant jasmine
let the mind become vast blue sky
infinite, eternal silence...
whose particles of
radiant love and light
are untouched by illusion's play
let the mind open up
and swallow
the beingness before creation
whose song is a melody
of HU
God's soundless sound
in our hearts
that can lead us
all the way
Home
*******
EGO KNOWS SURRENDER ... LOVE KNOWS ONENESS
the ego knows surrender ... love knows oneness
my heart knows love
expansive and ever expanding
infinite radiance!
that is the pure all
of this existence
and blesses me
greatly
reaching up to the sky
touching stars
and heavens
dancing in freedom
and abandon
to God's rhythm
and silent sound
of oneness
i am lost and dissolved
in the beginningless beginning
that has no end
*******
I AM LOVING YOU
"i am loving You sweetly... deeply... silently... devotedly... wildly... exhuberantly... divinely...
as the ocean is sometimes quiet, deep and still, at other times all movement...
so is my heart"
*******
THIS WONDROUS LOVE
"this wondrous and mysterious love i feel for/with You
goes ever deeper and ceaselessly higher,
and spreads so vastly
as to become a shoreless ocean..."
*******
HEED NOT THE MIND
heed not the mind ... let it not disturb
your peace, your knowing, your very being.
rest in absolute certainty of His love
that holds you so tenderly
offering a river of guidance and protection
that dissolves the fears and obstructions.
share the love and light,
the healer and the teacher.
the more you are a clear and open channel
the more you grow in Love's mysterious ways.
the heart is beautiful, infinite and pure.
*******
THE KAABA OF THE HEART
each day the seeker's pilgrimmage
is to the kaaba of the heart;
circling and circling the Great Mystery
he dissolves in surrendrance
at its still and silent core
*******
MY LIFE IS MY PRAYER AND PRAISE
my life is my prayer and praise
i want it to be pure and holy and selfless
but that is rarely the case.
often it is full of me instead of Thee
a sleepwalking forgetfulness
of identification with density
when the door to the heavens
stands invitingly wide open
let my life itself speak of my gratitude
my infinite gratitude and thankfulness
for your Grace, Beauty, Love
and utmost caring...
let my every step be a prayer
and my every word praise,
may my every touch be tenderness
and my every thought be of Oneness ...
may i know the bliss of no self
existing only as Love,
serving with every breath that
you've so generously bequeathed ...
Divine Beloved! Most Holy One!
all praise is Yours.
You are all Light
Love and Mercy
*******
THIS MORNING ALL TENDERNESS
this morning all tenderness
gentless and softness
like a pink cloud floating
in the infinite azure
opening of the heart
pulsating with life's breath
of gratitude and thankfulness
surrendering all separation
in Your Holy Name
of Love
all praise is Yours
oh beautiful One ...
Reality behind the manyness.
all Grace is Yours
all Love, only Love
*******
LOVE CAME
love came
i was surprised
i'd had no plans
no hopes
no dreams
for life to become
passionate melting ecstasy
i danced i smile
i cried i soared
my heart expanded
into infinite love
overflowing its container
it showered and flooded
mountains and plains
feeding plants and flowers
that blossomed everywhere
*******
LOVE TRICKS YOU
love tricks you
it sneaks into your life
and takes over
it turns you upside down
and inside out
creating a wild
majnun of the desert
and when you are
lost and dazed
it says time for housecleaning
let's clear out
everything
that is not me
so you gasp and choke
whine and act out
as the dust of your past
rises up and consumes you
bewildered and suffering
you don't understand
that this is really most definitely
a very good thing
*******
IN LOVE'S BLAZING FURNACE
In love's blazing furnace
flames are reaching
high to illumine
the inner sky
*******
I CAN SEE BEYOND
i can see beyond
the cobalt sky
if my gaze
is focused inward
searching for you
in vast space
infinite silence
prevails
like outworn ragged coverings
the desire for having
and knowing falls
to the wayside
and in your
unfathomable
embrace
i lose myself
forever
*******
HOW LONG
how long
before you realize
which way to face?
with the Sun before you
all the shadows
disappear.
*******
DANCE IN RHYTHM
dance in rhythm
to the Holy breath
sing songs from
the heart
of living love
be happy
where you are
as you are
right here
right now
without rules
and judgement
of how it's supposed
to be
the flower blooms perfectly
in its right time
*******
THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE!
thank you for being there!
even when i couldn't feel your loving support
the tender twinkle
of your compassionate gaze
the deep knowing
in your fathomless eyes
the connection in the heart
that never goes ...
*******
THERE ARE NO WORDS
there are no words
for life of the spirit,
only heart waves
of gratitude and love
*******
LOVE IS
love is unity and oneness, caring and compassion.
love is Holy. Precious. Divine.
love is beyond words and form ...
it is gentleness sublime,
achingly tender,
fiery and passionate,
burning and melting,
expansive and unbounded ...
it is without limit or definition
*******
I HAVE GIVEN UP SO MUCH
i have given up so much
and hardly even noticed
as its become easier and easier
not to worry —
leaving all in Your hands
has been my ticket to peace.
but look what's arrived — now
i am down on my knees!
this attachment i have
is consuming my life.
there will be no rest
until selflessness is achieved.
There will be no rest
until Surrender is complete.
*******
IT IS IMPORTANT TO RELEASE JUDGMENTS
it is important to release judgments
of how things ought to be,
the unconscious unspoken demand
of 'my will is what should be'.
God knows all and is all
there are no mistakes, you see
surrendering self is the only way
to escape pain and misery.
*******
I THINK I AM READY
what a melodramatic soap opera
i am in ...
think i'm ready
to change the channel
now
*******
LOVE PICKS YOU UP
Love picks you up
like flower puff on the wind
transporting you to unnamed lands
of milk and honey
where ecstasy whirls its dance
in selfless sweet abandon
and dazed travelers
lose their I-ness
in the Ocean of Love
*******
LOVE LEAVES NO TRACE
love leaves no trace, no sound, no mark,
no displacement of anything
love holds, caresses, whispers, touches, soothes,
enfolds and supports
anything and everything
it bumps up against
it captures and captivates
enriching, endowing, enhancing
everything it permeates
*******
YOUR PRESENCE HAS IGNITED A FIRE IN MY HEART
Your presence has ignited a fire in my heart
and illumined the night sky.
tears of joy glisten in unbounded love,
and stars dance their way across the heavens.
*******
LOVE IS DEEP IN THE EYES
Love is deep in the eyes,
full in the heart,
a Light in the soul.
*******
SOMETIMES EMPTY
sometimes empty
feels like loss
and sometimes
like gain
*******
LOVE IS RAPTUROUS
love is rapturous, love is serene.
love pulls you close and love pushes you away.
love grinds you up and makes you into a shining jewel.
it tears your heart to pieces
and then re-creates you
into a wonder and mystery
of great beauty.
*******
I AM SO HELPLESS
i am so helpless
and dependent
on You;
i am so happy to be surrendered
to You!
my quiet mind and bubbling joy
say i am nothing and so glad of it.
i sacrifice my little will to the Great Will
that is omniscient and eternally
compassionate and benevolent,
which provides with perfection
exactly what is needed
in each moment
for each of us.
whether rose or thorn
His mercy and glory is manifested,
shining divinity
into our little lives
like the sun
warms the earth
*******
WHAT LIBERATION THE QUIET MIND
what liberation the quiet mind
the open heart
the peace of surrender
*******
LOVE SINGS ENCHANTING MELODIES
Love sings enchanting melodies
and creates harmonies never heard
by the outer ear
*******
*******
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