PAMSPOEMS

Pam Topley

MOON AND STARS

I saw a shooting star this night
So I wished
I wished that you were here
But oh contrary heavenly light
Left me standing still, alone.
Just standing there
Staring at a sky full of the wishes
Of thousands over ancient time,
Unfulfilled — just like mine

So the new moon came
And I wished again.
I willed it to answer my prayer.
But the moon though new
Left me just standing there

So on my knees I fell
My God the tale to tell
He answered me: In patience wait
Your time will come.
So, I still stand waiting
Hands outstretched for
Not moon or stars, but
Love to bring you near

A VOICE

Baba I understood we come to earth with a choice.
If this is so I'm sure I would have asked for a voice
A voice that produced sweet gentle singing
Not like flat out of tune cracked bells ringing!

My whole life I've wanted to sing
So to all the world good music bring.
At school my friends sang in soaring high crescendo
—Me? flat, wrong key, a meek and sickly alto
I guess now it's too late with the years rushing by
Now all I can do is listen and sigh

Next life Baba give me a break
Remind me to ask for a sweet singing voice
So that I too may show how much in your love I rejoice

SHADOWS

"God is infinite and His Shadow is also infinite. The Shadow of God is the Infinite Space that accommodates the infinite Gross Sphere which with its occurrences of millions of universes, within and without the range of men's knowledge, is the Creation that issued from the Point of Finiteness in the infinite Existence that is God."

The Everything and the Nothing, 16, "The Four Journeys"
Copyright AMBPPCT

We see you only in your shadow
For shadows there is no growth
Just the false illusion as the sun
Lengthens or shortens the image
According to its own brightness
No feelings deep, no reviving sleep
No understanding, compassionless

Show us your whole self untouched by fear or doubt
Show us the brightness of your face
In gentle pure and even light
Not in the long shadow at the start of night
Show us the joy the real joy of real sight
That we might fight the negativity of shadows
Show us the sweetness of your compassion
So we might emulate your glowing luminosity

Give us the inner peace of knowing
Shadows exist only in the mind
Yet through a sip of your sweet wine
The reality of your true love we can find

OCEAN'S BUBBLES

The waves crashing on the sandy shore
The white foam dancing
With millions of bubbles prancing
Rushing to meet the land and creations law
You just one bubble amongst billions
Each crashing wave bringing more foam more bubbles
Some retreating back to sea and safety of the known,
Some bursting to greet the air and experience the new, unknown
But incessantly unrelenting the foam all the time dancing
The waves crashing crashing like mountains falling into the sea
The bubbles uncertain which way to go
Should they find new life, new horizons
Or retreat to the safety of the outgoing tide
To be swallowed into the depths of another sea
Repeating the pattern on another as yet unknown shore
Where there too the waves will crash against the sandy shore
And the foam will dance and the bubbles prance
Oh bubble which way to go?

ANOTHER DAY

One day you make me laugh
Another day you'll make me cry
One day you make me sigh
Some day you'll make me die
Then you'll make me live again
Oh why oh why just WHY?

You'll make me like a bouncing ball
Some lives tall and some lives small
Every lifetime to recall

Again to laugh to sigh to cry
Again to await that final breath
So i might live again in death
forever reaching for that promised goal
To re-affirm, You hold my soul

LANDED

I have landed in every country in this world,
Sat on each of the seas' sandy shores,
Each oceans' pebbled beach.
Every rock pool I explore
Is occupied by salty creatures of the seas.
I have been trapped in iceflows
And watched the polar bears at play.

I have been burned by scorching sun on sand,
Been lashed by fearsome storms,
Forced hundreds of miles off my course,
Been gently taken to still calm waters.
But eventually I will come to the place I'm meant to be
For I am but one bubble in the foam of the mighty sea.

LOST AND FOUND

I did stray from my Path's way
But I felt so sure that you would stay
And keep my feet from stumbling,
My thoughts from wandering.
Ignorant and blind I blamed you for my own stupidity
And for religion's rigidity.

So without more ado I knuckled down to enjoy
My own kind of wine — tho 'twas not as sweet as thine.
I drank and ate my full yet no friends I made,
Just empty noisy jollity.
No intimacy or love met me on this particular path.

Yet somehow all along that path I knew,
I knew it was my mind and not my heart that led astray.
But in my loneliness and grief I charged you to be the thief
That stole my heart at heavens gate
And left me so bereft I thought my whole self would break.

It seemed you turned your back and let me stay angry and alone
So there was no need to greet me or show your love Divine.
In desperation I thought to live without your Grace
And without your wine.
Crushed and friendless, I turned away from this place
And only then did you turn with your lovely face toward me
And you picked me up and placed me at your feet.

LOVE JUST IS

Love, alone, suspended in a void
Waiting, hurting, Freudian
In it's longing to be loved,
Hoping, waiting its turn to give love.

Love does not deserve to be,
Nor does love deserve not to be —
Love just is.

Love can move only in its own void
Or it can encompass the whole world.
It has its own rights and reasons,
Independent of distance, range or seasons.

Yet this same love, which can move mountains,
Can freeze a word, a glance, make immobile
A hand wanting to reach out to a beloved.

Love captures everything, gives everything,
Accepts everything
Yet obeys the laws of freedom.

Love we say is blind — not so.
It sees far beyond the mind.
Love's instinct knows where all else is blind.

Love expands never binds.
Selfless love needs no sacrificial gestures
For love will share equally in both joy and sorrow.

So with love take care, to abuse it never dare.
Leave it not in suspended void state
But set it free to see it grow at its own pace
For to refuse love its freedom leads to soul's stalemate.